Hookers or Cake

Happy 4th of July!

:

Robert Frank.  Super 8.  The g.d. Rolling Stones.

Fun fact: this was probably filmed within a coupla’ months of my birth.  Hard to imagine that I co-existed with this world, in any way.

Fucking hell - Exile gets me high - like a magic spell - that never ends

The Beach Boys (featuring Mike Love & John Stamos) played after the Florida Marlins baseball game this past Saturday night. “Those are not the real Beach Boys,” I explained to a small red headed child in KISS make-up.

Small Child: Are they robots?

Me: (drunk and 39) No. They are a hologram of our suffering.

Small Child: Like fake ghosts?

Me: (excited) YES YES! Fake Ghosts that haunt state fairs and mall openings…

Small Child: They’re not very scary.

Me: I know, its a shame isn’t it.

I then lit a cigarette and was repeatedly tasered and pummeled by security forces. Kokomo was playing. And just before I lost consciousness I swore I saw Brian Wilson’s smiling face in the sky, giving me a big thumbs up.

The Buddha opened his eyes and saw the stoner sitting before him. The stoner was holding a white lotus and smiling like he’d just eaten a plate full of delightful snacks off the devils ass.

The Buddha nodded in acknowledgement to the stoner and the stoner bowed before the Buddha and went on his way.

…later, one of the Buddha’s disciples asked about the exchange. The Buddha replied, “I don’t fucking know dude… that guy was high as shit. He’s probably 6 miles deep in the woods right now getting raped by a bear.”

The gingerbread crackhouse came out pretty nicely.

Can’t wait to smoke it.

“You clear that bong right this instant young lady! There are bored kids in the suburbs who would give their spleens for that bowl.”

- June Cleever

The research continues…

“So maybe I had a little too much to drink last night. I thought that I was listening to Skip James and enjoying a giant pile of cocaine. Come to find out my roommates white cat was just meowing at me because I kept poking at it with my American Express card and trying to snort it.”

- Condoleezza Rice

“No point mentioning those bats, I thought. The poor bastard will see them soon enough.”

- HST

and just as God was twittering about some new internet porn that is also a tasty, healthy snack, I awoke from the dream.

I spent the next several weeks in a deep meditative state trying to recall the magical 140 character message. This was important, not only would it make me rich but it would also satisfy my every desire. Like if the body of Christ tasted like Doritos’s or chocolate but then also satisfied the deep longing to merge joyously into a blissful unity and wholeness.  Like diet soda that actually tasted delicious but then also had a great set of tits.

NOM NOM NOM indeed.

I chuckle as I write this, remembering that the first last supper (aka communion) was all about eating magical mushrooms. Some folks argue that all religions come from mushroom eating. Whatever the case I think we can all agree that good drugs sure have influenced music and the snack industry in some wonderful ways and plays of being.