Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

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      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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          • May 23, 2011 9:16 pm
            School was starting next week and I needed that KISS Gene Simmons notebook. But my mom wouldn’t buy it for me. She told me KISS worshiped Satan. Like most 7 year olds I was unsure what a Satanist was, I just thought KISS looked cool as hell. The problem now was all my friends were getting KISS posters, t-shirts and I had nothing. I’d even outgrown my Spiderman shoes. I was pretty bummed. I remember going over to my Grandma’s house and my uncle Marty had a ton of KISS stuff. I’d never heard their music, so he played me some… I was baffled. They looked like demons but they sounded just like everyone else. They were just a boy band dressed up like monsters. I lost all interest.  I wonder if right now there’s a 7 yr old girl having the same experience with Lady Gaga?

            School was starting next week and I needed that KISS Gene Simmons notebook. But my mom wouldn’t buy it for me. She told me KISS worshiped Satan. Like most 7 year olds I was unsure what a Satanist was, I just thought KISS looked cool as hell.

            The problem now was all my friends were getting KISS posters, t-shirts and I had nothing. I’d even outgrown my Spiderman shoes. I was pretty bummed. I remember going over to my Grandma’s house and my uncle Marty had a ton of KISS stuff. I’d never heard their music, so he played me some… I was baffled. They looked like demons but they sounded just like everyone else. They were just a boy band dressed up like monsters. I lost all interest. 

            I wonder if right now there’s a 7 yr old girl having the same experience with Lady Gaga?

            34 notes Filed under:  KISS, Lady Gaga, Thank God for real drag queens, missquotes, music, prose,.
            1. reblogged this from hookersorcake
            2. answered: Let’s hope so, for theoretical little girl’s sake.
            3. answered: I had samesies with Master P; tricked my grandma into getting me some uncensored music. Only I told myself it was cool for at least a year.
            4. reblogged this from hookersorcake
            5. answered: Much like Madonna before her, Gaga cribs from some wonderful 20th century performance artists and presents them to an unknowing populace.
            6. hookersorcake posted this
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