Hookers or Cake

thisistheglamorous:

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As  said:

HOLY FUCK, THIS IS AMAZING.

THAT WOULD BE AN UNDERSTATEMENT.

YES THE INTERNET!!! ohhhh! I wanna high five God in the ass!

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Join Or Die - a series of paintings where Justine Lai has painted herself having sex with each US President, in chronological order!

Splendid idea. Now if she would have only painted Lincolns perfect thighs… (sigh)

Well damn girl! If you aint gonna hit that - I’s gonna jump over this here picnic table and put this Aunt Jemimah bottle to some good use.

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Some people always choose the shittiest guys to date.I can relate, because I always choose the shittest vibrator. I turn it on and it just tells me I’ve gained weight…

??Too Many naked women!

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To many pics of women wearing nothing coming on my page….lol….

Is there some way I could filter it and don’t have to see them at all??

I made a long post last nite,asking the few people that were posting all this porn and naked women to please stop. Please be respectful of the rest of us that do not subscribe to X-rated blogs. That post is a few pages back in my blog.As I stated in that post,if they didn’t stop posting all this porn,I would have no chocie,but to stop following them.I warned others would also stop following them,and to please show us the same respect here,as on SU. My advise,now that this is the 2nd time in 24 hours this has been brought up…stop following the people with all the naked women and porn. I had hoped they would have read my post,that came from 6 others also,and stopped doing it today. It really disturbs me. I follow a bunch of great young tumblrs,who only post a reasonable number of things a day,and never naked women,yet the grown men from SU,have turned my dashboard into 100’s of porn images. This must stop. You all are my friends.Please show some respect for me and the others that follow you and keep it decent :)

Most people are not going to take it personally when someone stops following them. They’ll take it a lot less personally than being asked not to post what they want. Just my opinion, and I promise not to take it personally if you all un-follow me because of it.

yeah I lost a couple of followers with a post - it was a cartoon and i found it pretty hilarious… but some were offended and unfollwed me and I’m cool wit that. Ya see the whole thing that makes Tumblr awesome is that if you don’t like what someone posts you can UNFOLLOW them. its really freeing - try it some time! - you unfollow all the ‘dirty pic posters and your house will smell like fresh baked pie!!!!

I  unfollowed some lame-O that posted 50 pics of same boring porn shoot. “Dude post 1 or 2 pics and a link!” I’ve also unfollowed a few pedos that just keep reblogging pics of that 13yr old girl from Harry Potter. “Come on Buddy your 40, old to be her grandfather, if your from Georgia.”

So unfollow the filth mongers, subscribe to the Readers Digest, and tell Pat Boone I still have his cock ring.

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Albert knows how to turn a double play.

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a cowboy’s work is never done

well when its 50% off everything at Chet’s Galleria of Horse Cock…

Madam

I would snatch the Gin Gimlet right from the Devil’s hand hisself to toast your gigglin’ wrigglin’ beauty.  I would then cry out in pain… because, come to find out, the Devil’s glass is very very hot.

…nonetheless

I would hire Rip Taylor to forever follow you. Lavishing your entrance and exits with celebratory confetti. And if Rip Taylor grew weary I would buy him a Segway scooter & vitamins. Perhaps I would even pay for his hip replacement surgery and subsequent rehabilitation. For lo the sun will never set on the celebration that is your very being. I would fuckstart Reo Speedwagons career and countless other terrible 80’s bands if only just to sing endlessly, of the bliss, that is your interwoven fun sprung ass. I would dig up Elvis Presley and  steal his handkerchief, just to mop the sweat from your bodacious ta-ta’s and then I would save said kerchief… and when I sold it on E-bay I wouldn’t even mention Elvis.

My Dear, millions have spanked to your low res, low angle sugar - wasting entire galaxies of future mall walkers in the process. Reflect on all of the happiness you have given. Think of all the delirious flush faced prayers. My wondrous destroyer and giver of life, my final question unto you is thus… are you ever gonna PM me some pussy shots or what?!

Classic Miller Lite “Taste Great, Less Filling” commercial from the 70’s

Remember that one were they gang raped Bob Eucker?

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