Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

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    • ------------------------------------- How this blog got its name

      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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          • August 6, 2012 1:26 am
            I’ve been busy writing a new zombie spec script. In it the zombies don’t try to kill people and eat their flesh. They are more of a rude inconvenience, always in the way and a danger, because they might infect you. The real trouble starts when the protagonist realizes the zombies have slowly eaten his soul, turning him into a hateful, piece of shit burnout, an even worse fate than being a zombie. He has to figure out how to get his soul back or if that’s even possible. In the second act its just blood guts and mayhem, orgies, explosions,  and a fill in the blank love interest. The protagonist finds himself trying to save an old crippled zombie (played by big name actor in a oscar winning performance) and in saving the zombie, the selfish scales fall from our protagonists eyes and love blooms in his heart and he see’s that there never where any zombies, just a silly frightened man.  The working title is Zombie Cunt Fucker VI (Joe Bob’s lament)

            I’ve been busy writing a new zombie spec script.

            In it the zombies don’t try to kill people and eat their flesh. They are more of a rude inconvenience, always in the way and a danger, because they might infect you. The real trouble starts when the protagonist realizes the zombies have slowly eaten his soul, turning him into a hateful, piece of shit burnout, an even worse fate than being a zombie. He has to figure out how to get his soul back or if that’s even possible.

            In the second act its just blood guts and mayhem, orgies, explosions,  and a fill in the blank love interest. The protagonist finds himself trying to save an old crippled zombie (played by big name actor in a oscar winning performance) and in saving the zombie, the selfish scales fall from our protagonists eyes and love blooms in his heart and he see’s that there never where any zombies, just a silly frightened man. 

            The working title is Zombie Cunt Fucker VI (Joe Bob’s lament)

          • May 31, 2012 4:18 pm
          • March 18, 2011 10:17 pm
            I’ve always had reoccurring nightmares about zombies but lately my dreams have taken a turn for the sexy. Hot Zombie 3-way - Zombie Orgy  and the neat thing about zombie sex is it doesn’t matter if they’re a boy or a girl or a canned ham or whatever - zombies by their very nature are full of holes and in the middle of a blood orgy any orifice will do. The bummer is that the sex isn’t very good, not that it doesn’t physically feel good. No the sex feels awesome, its just that… I dunno the zombies don’t really seem that into it ya know?

            I’ve always had reoccurring nightmares about zombies but lately my dreams have taken a turn for the sexy.

            Hot Zombie 3-way - Zombie Orgy 

            and the neat thing about zombie sex is it doesn’t matter if they’re a boy or a girl or a canned ham or whatever - zombies by their very nature are full of holes and in the middle of a blood orgy any orifice will do.

            The bummer is that the sex isn’t very good, not that it doesn’t physically feel good. No the sex feels awesome, its just that… I dunno the zombies don’t really seem that into it ya know?