Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

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    • ------------------------------------- How this blog got its name

      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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          • July 22, 2010 11:32 am
            So I killed my computer. Fried the bios. Its not too big of deal. I had a lot of my stuff on an external drive. I’ll have to rescan most of drawings for my book and recreate a few other things as well.  Its more annoying than anything. Working/fixing computers just crushes any drop of creativity I might have.  The book is coming along real well though. Actually its pretty much done. We just have to tweak it and finalize the layout. Then its off to the printer for our fist proof.  Oh hey I could use one thing. I am looking for a couple of more pull out quotes for the back cover. You know where Oprah writes “This book is better than a dove bar filled with delicious meats…” and hey if you happen to be famous I can use your real name and thats one fewer lawsuit for me. If your not famous just tell me that you are and I won’t know. Just say your on that reality show where midgets perform plastic surgery on homeless people… I hear its a triumph of the human spirit, sad but joyously so. email me your quote at bosjade at gmail.com or just reply or answer? The best quote will be on the front cover of my new book and dozens upon dozens of people will see it.  It’ll become a mantra for disenchanted sex workers and used golf pro’s alike. ?

            So I killed my computer. Fried the bios. Its not too big of deal. I had a lot of my stuff on an external drive. I’ll have to rescan most of drawings for my book and recreate a few other things as well.  Its more annoying than anything. Working/fixing computers just crushes any drop of creativity I might have. 

            The book is coming along real well though. Actually its pretty much done. We just have to tweak it and finalize the layout. Then its off to the printer for our fist proof. 

            Oh hey I could use one thing. I am looking for a couple of more pull out quotes for the back cover. You know where Oprah writes “This book is better than a dove bar filled with delicious meats…” and hey if you happen to be famous I can use your real name and thats one fewer lawsuit for me. If your not famous just tell me that you are and I won’t know. Just say your on that reality show where midgets perform plastic surgery on homeless people… I hear its a triumph of the human spirit, sad but joyously so.

            email me your quote at bosjade at gmail.com

            or just reply

            or answer?

            The best quote will be on the front cover of my new book and dozens upon dozens of people will see it.  It’ll become a mantra for disenchanted sex workers and used golf pro’s alike.

            ?

            1. answered: Further proof of a Mustache Cabal - Dick Kittens
            2. answered: Erica from Vancouver raves: “I used this book to start fire to an old age home!”
            3. answered: Most serial killers haven’t read this book and I think that says something. —Hannibal Lectern (I’ve got nothing)
            4. answered: “The best book I never read” - Helen Keller (she can’t sue you)
            5. answered: “If I had a choice between this book or eating a bag of hair, I’d do both, so I could have my cake and eat that too.” - Wesley Snipes.
            6. answered: Man With Head Wound says, “Hookers or Cake tastes like copper! I can invincible!”
            7. answered: this book sucks. your dick. threshold - famous on the internets
            8. answered: Hookers or cake: Probably an okay book.
            9. answered: this book is serious and you ‘ll regret it .
            10. answered: do middle-aged midgets count?
            11. hookersorcake posted this