Writing tips from a shitty writer: Do not write fiction on LSD.
example:
…this one girl who had a fake god, that dated a robot, who knew a guy, who wrote stories about this one girl who had a fake god, that dated a robot, who knew a guy, who wrote stories about this one girl, who had a fake god, that dated a robot, who knew a guy, who wrote stories about… shit, I’m everything again, said the author.
See? A plotless, all seeing eye of the cosmos that becomes everything and then you just float around saying insane shit about joy and pudding. No one is gonna buy that. Sure the stoners will love it, but guess what people? Stoners don’t buy a lot of books.
You need cocaine if your going to be a success. You also need to be alone while on that cocaine and preferably trapped in a life that is running out of options as fast as its taking on soul crushing debt. A dead end with a giant monster staring you in the face. This plus cocaine is great foundation for a young adult novel about finding true love and acceptance. Don’t make it weird. Most readers just want to be entertained and reassured. Just get to the part where everything makes sense sexually, emotionally, or intellectually and the readers sociological & physiological programming will resonate within the heart, mind, or body giving feelings of security. If you can touch on all three it’ll sell like hotcakes. Of course none of it really means anything, afterall we’re all just a fake god giving oral pleasure to a robot.
