Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

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    • ------------------------------------- How this blog got its name

      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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          • April 8, 2011 4:57 pm
            “I hate this fucking place and I hate these stupid fucking people! I hate all of you! Ya hear me! Y’all suck!” - Jesus Christ  Most Atheists and Christians miss the entire point altogether. I’ve been a Christian an Atheist and several other flavors of belief so I can appreciate all the ways and plays of us humans trying to wrap our widdle heads around the roaring torrent of life.  It aint easy. We try and make things work but it always gets fucked up by some fuckhead. And as we mature we may begin to realize, the fuckhead is us. This is where Christianity is supposed to come in. “For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God” IE. We’re all fuck ups. Passive-obsessive-compulsive-aggressive-nut-jobs.  So Christ wanders in and says “I know yer a fucking cunt… but I love you ya big ol worthless fuck.”  Again I’m paraphrasing but thats the gist. To be a Christian you have to accept Christ into your heart. This does not mean you have to sign some legal document that verifies you believe God impregnated a young Jewish Virgin (God is a pedophile?) and then that girl had a son who was half man and half God and that son let himself be tortured and killed so that if you sign onto his softball team when you die you get to hang out at his Dads totally awesome cabin for like ever!!! No. Thats how you teach a 3 year old or a barbaric civilization how to shit in one place and eat in anther… I’m  just talking about accepting Christ into your heart = letting yourself be loved.  Let love in. And no I’m not talking dirty hippy BS or grab ass in the backseat (though thats all groovy) I’m talking about being big enough to admit you’re wrong and you don’t know everything and you’re a fuck up and accepting an invitation to a larger situation. Larger than yourself or anyone else. The situation is Love.  And it comes in a suprising myriad of forms. 

            “I hate this fucking place and I hate these stupid fucking people! I hate all of you! Ya hear me! Y’all suck!” - Jesus Christ 

            Most Atheists and Christians miss the entire point altogether. I’ve been a Christian an Atheist and several other flavors of belief so I can appreciate all the ways and plays of us humans trying to wrap our widdle heads around the roaring torrent of life.  It aint easy. We try and make things work but it always gets fucked up by some fuckhead. And as we mature we may begin to realize, the fuckhead is us. This is where Christianity is supposed to come in.

            “For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God” IE. We’re all fuck ups. Passive-obsessive-compulsive-aggressive-nut-jobs.  So Christ wanders in and says “I know yer a fucking cunt… but I love you ya big ol worthless fuck.”  Again I’m paraphrasing but thats the gist. To be a Christian you have to accept Christ into your heart. This does not mean you have to sign some legal document that verifies you believe God impregnated a young Jewish Virgin (God is a pedophile?) and then that girl had a son who was half man and half God and that son let himself be tortured and killed so that if you sign onto his softball team when you die you get to hang out at his Dads totally awesome cabin for like ever!!! No. Thats how you teach a 3 year old or a barbaric civilization how to shit in one place and eat in anther…

            I’m  just talking about accepting Christ into your heart = letting yourself be loved.  Let love in. And no I’m not talking dirty hippy BS or grab ass in the backseat (though thats all groovy) I’m talking about being big enough to admit you’re wrong and you don’t know everything and you’re a fuck up and accepting an invitation to a larger situation. Larger than yourself or anyone else. The situation is Love.  And it comes in a suprising myriad of forms. 

          • March 25, 2011 9:06 am
            nice.

            nice.

          • March 11, 2011 11:05 am
          • January 28, 2011 1:00 pm
            Charles Barkley & Dick Bavetta’s love knows no bounds.

            Charles Barkley & Dick Bavetta’s love knows no bounds.

          • January 21, 2011 9:18 am
            rrrick: Say it with flowers TGIumF = Thank God Its unfollow me Friday.

            : Say it with flowers

            TGIumF = Thank God Its unfollow me Friday.

          • January 14, 2011 9:03 am
            TGIF… now with 100% more Gorilla tits and guns!

            TGIF… now with 100% more Gorilla tits and guns!


          • December 3, 2010 9:01 am
            TGIF Earthlings…

            TGIF Earthlings…

          • November 19, 2010 10:02 am
            TGIF Bitches…

            TGIF Bitches…

            (Source: )

          • November 5, 2010 8:38 am
            TGIF Bitches…

            TGIF Bitches…

          • October 29, 2010 7:33 pm

            but wheres the fajita’s and the pcp?!