Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

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    • ------------------------------------- How this blog got its name

      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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          • December 25, 2012 2:36 pm
            I just sent the sacred Christmas texts and shot the Christmas guns! I’m gonna snack on a little Christmas meth and work on some Christmas puns! I gotta take the kids to get their Christmas tattoos and then cruise on down to the Christmas buffet at the Manhole, sure a gay stripclub might be an odd choice for a family Christmas dinner, but they have the best drink specials. Also later we can saunter over to the Booby Trap for something a little more traditional. I think they are doing a nakedtivity scene this year with Ed Asner as Baby Jesus.

            I just sent the sacred Christmas texts and shot the Christmas guns! I’m gonna snack on a little Christmas meth and work on some Christmas puns!

            I gotta take the kids to get their Christmas tattoos and then cruise on down to the Christmas buffet at the Manhole, sure a gay stripclub might be an odd choice for a family Christmas dinner, but they have the best drink specials. Also later we can saunter over to the Booby Trap for something a little more traditional. I think they are doing a nakedtivity scene this year with Ed Asner as Baby Jesus.