Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

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    • ------------------------------------- How this blog got its name

      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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          • December 16, 2011 11:57 pm
            Lost in some soft tumbling darkness wandering to the store in a stoners happy haze ice cream and maybe some chips… I see Jesus is on the roof at Walgreens. He’s gigantic and has creamy white thighs and Oh wow! He’s… yeah he’s touching it. Jesus came back as a giant, listless, sexual pervert. At first it was a really big deal.  “Christ has returned!” It was all anyone talked about and then he just became a nuisance. Jacking off to a field of flowers or a sunset people would just call the fire department and they’d hose him down and he’d try and smash the fire truck. You’d be driving home and the radio would say, Jesus is north of 57th on the turnpike and tearing shit up. Traffic would be backed up for miles. Yeah, Jesus aint gonna go so quietly the second time.

            Lost in some soft tumbling darkness

            wandering to the store in a stoners happy haze

            ice cream and maybe some chips…

            I see Jesus is on the roof at Walgreens. He’s gigantic and has creamy white thighs and Oh wow! He’s… yeah he’s touching it.

            Jesus came back as a giant, listless, sexual pervert. At first it was a really big deal. 

            “Christ has returned!” It was all anyone talked about

            and then he just became a nuisance.

            Jacking off to a field of flowers or a sunset

            people would just call the fire department

            and they’d hose him down and he’d try and smash the fire truck.

            You’d be driving home and the radio would say, Jesus is north of 57th on the turnpike and tearing shit up. Traffic would be backed up for miles.

            Yeah, Jesus aint gonna go so quietly the second time.