Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

--------------------------------

    • Illustration
      •
    • My Videos
    • The best of Hookers or Cake
      • ------------------------------------- How this blog got its name

      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

      -----------------------------------

      Amazon.com Widgets

      -------------------------------------- more fun categories

      --------------------------------------

      • Inspiration
      • art
        • ----------------------------------------- some tumblr friends

        -----------------------------------------

        • Rrrick
        • Fuzzy Dave
        • Wonder Tonic
          • ----------------------------------------- some writing

          -----------------------------------------

          • Josh Luft
          • I'm a Veronica
        • Mr. King was here
          • Aloha Friday
          ----------------------------------------
          tell me lies! Submit stuff
          • July 31, 2011 9:47 pm
            Hey I got a new book coming out this fall - Hookers or Cake II! I’ve taken some cues (and underthingys) from Madonna in realizing, if you’re an aging tranny without any discernible talent you need to hire the best to be the best. This is why Joshua Allen is my new editor. And if you live under a rock and don’t know who Josh Allen is, might I suggest his tumblr 10 Sexy Ladies, where Mr. Allen rates everything on a scale of 1-10 sexy ladies. Mr. Allen is also a freelance writer for hire over at Fireland. He’s just too damn good. I am thrilled to fucking death.

            Hey I got a new book coming out this fall - Hookers or Cake II!

            I’ve taken some cues (and underthingys) from Madonna in realizing, if you’re an aging tranny without any discernible talent you need to hire the best to be the best.

            This is why Joshua Allen is my new editor. And if you live under a rock and don’t know who Josh Allen is, might I suggest his tumblr 10 Sexy Ladies, where Mr. Allen rates everything on a scale of 1-10 sexy ladies. Mr. Allen is also a freelance writer for hire over at Fireland. He’s just too damn good. I am thrilled to fucking death.

            32 notes Filed under:  Hookers or Cake II, just when you thought it was safe to not give a fuck,.
            1. thedailydoodles said: Awesome!!!
            2. reblogged this from hookersorcake
            3. said: Congratulations and two pinches of the tranny nips!
            4. said: Holy s—-! F—k yeah! [edited for children’s eyes]
            5. said: A match made in heaven.
            6. hookersorcake posted this
          by Peter Vidani. For .
          © 2009–2013 Hookers or Cake