Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

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      • ------------------------------------- How this blog got its name

      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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          • July 7, 2010 8:38 pm
            GPOYW Senior picture edition - 20 years & 20 lbs ago So my 20th year high school reunion is this summer. I’m not going, so they asked me to send an update on my life for a big newsletter to be sent out to all our former classmates. I sent them an autographed copy of my 700+ page autobiographical tome entitled Fuck You… I’m a World Champion I also sent along a large nude painting of my family, painted by Egon Schiele on loan from the Leopold museum in Vienna. Then today I received the big newsletter for our reunion in the mail. My entry reads… Jade B. currently lives in Florida and is apparently nuts. They didn’t even include a picture of the painting. LAME.

            GPOYW Senior picture edition - 20 years & 20 lbs ago

            So my 20th year high school reunion is this summer. I’m not going, so they asked me to send an update on my life for a big newsletter to be sent out to all our former classmates. I sent them an autographed copy of my 700+ page autobiographical tome entitled Fuck You… I’m a World Champion I also sent along a large nude painting of my family, painted by Egon Schiele on loan from the Leopold museum in Vienna.

            Then today I received the big newsletter for our reunion in the mail. My entry reads…

            Jade B. currently lives in Florida and is apparently nuts.

            They didn’t even include a picture of the painting. LAME.

            31 notes Filed under:  GPOYW, senior pics?, squares, silly stories,.
            1. said: Nuts. In a good way.
            2. said: lol, I would love to see that Nude painting of your family please post that on your page.
            3. hookersorcake posted this
          by Peter Vidani. For .
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