Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

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    • ------------------------------------- How this blog got its name

      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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          tell me lies! Submit stuff
          • May 17, 2010 10:28 am
            So now because of Facebook’s “privacy policy” everyone will know that I am a Single, Bi, pirate, clown hater who is 72, in a complicated relationship and a Orthodox Presbyterian Satanist who lives in Detroit with his 2 puppies Floey & Ivan Fyodorovich Karamazov?  Sure the couple hundred or so ‘friends’ that I haven’t seen or exchanged a physical word with in 10 or 15 years know, but EVERYONE?!! The TV Media needs to stop worrying about famine & war and get on this story like its a OD’d D-list celebrity. Next thing you know EVERYONE will be able to see all my private pics from when I used to work at Glory Hole Donuts or when I was a Republican page. Its getting so a person can’t show off pics of their new ass implants to a few hundred casual acquaintances without BIG BROTHER making catty comments. This is worse than that BS Parrot Act!  I’m seriously considering just deleting my Facebook account or worse… maybe editing my profile information. But thats such a pain and its just not fair I WANT EVERYONE to KNOW WHO I AM and WHAT I STAND FOR!!!! plus I don’t have the time! I’m too busy blogging about Stephan’s terrible new hairplugs! OMFG! did you see him at Karens party?!  He looked like a Joe Biden Doll ROFLMFAO! So anyway I’m going on vacation Tuesday for a few weeks and I might need someone to house sit and pic up my mail. Maybe I’ll just take out an ad on craigslist? Well off to the bank. I just got paid! Every Monday like clock work! Oh and a special HI to my 43 new Followers! You are all awesome. TTFN MFers!

            So now because of Facebook’s “privacy policy” everyone will know that I am a Single, Bi, pirate, clown hater who is 72, in a complicated relationship and a Orthodox Presbyterian Satanist who lives in Detroit with his 2 puppies Floey & Ivan Fyodorovich Karamazov?

             Sure the couple hundred or so ‘friends’ that I haven’t seen or exchanged a physical word with in 10 or 15 years know, but EVERYONE?!! The TV Media needs to stop worrying about famine & war and get on this story like its a OD’d D-list celebrity.

            Next thing you know EVERYONE will be able to see all my private pics from when I used to work at Glory Hole Donuts or when I was a Republican page. Its getting so a person can’t show off pics of their new ass implants to a few hundred casual acquaintances without BIG BROTHER making catty comments. This is worse than that BS Parrot Act!

             I’m seriously considering just deleting my Facebook account or worse… maybe editing my profile information. But thats such a pain and its just not fair I WANT EVERYONE to KNOW WHO I AM and WHAT I STAND FOR!!!! plus I don’t have the time! I’m too busy blogging about Stephan’s terrible new hairplugs! OMFG! did you see him at Karens party?!  He looked like a Joe Biden Doll ROFLMFAO!

            So anyway I’m going on vacation Tuesday for a few weeks and I might need someone to house sit and pic up my mail. Maybe I’ll just take out an ad on craigslist?

            Well off to the bank. I just got paid! Every Monday like clock work!

            Oh and a special HI to my 43 new Followers! You are all awesome.

            TTFN MFers!

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