Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.


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    • ------------------------------------- How this blog got its name

      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.


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          • May 21, 2011 12:38 am

            Happy Rapture!

            Whats everyone drinking?

            1. thedailydoodles answered: Ice tea and opium
            2. answered: PCP
            3. answered: Pants.
            4. answered: Mother-fucking diet green tea!
            5. said: Jack and Holy Waters.
            6. answered: blood
            7. answered: Organic Jasmine Green Tea…WooHooo
            8. answered: Vodka cola light
            9. answered: I was drinking red wine straight from the bottle, but now that its morning, I’m just chewing cola bubble gum.
            10. reblogged this from hookersorcake
            11. reblogged this from hookersorcake and added:
            12. said: Potosi Pure Malt Cave Ale
            13. criminalwisdom said: Vodka.
            14. answered: Cran-Grape and Ginger Ale, straight, no chaser
            15. answered: Urine!
            16. answered: lemonade n champagne!
            17. reblogged this from
            18. answered: Mercury in Gatorade for me, please. Or purple drank. Whatever works.
            19. answered: Blood and tears of the innocent.
            20. answered: Tea. I’m a big pussy.
            21. answered: Banana Berry Power =) yummy :9
            22. reblogged this from hookersorcake
            23. answered: smirnoff!
            24. answered: Sierra Mist. Fuhgit.
            25. answered: PLINY THE ELDER. Drink a real beer please.
            26. answered: Amaretto and Earl Grey. The drink to watch the world end, IMVHO.
            27. answered: patron and pomegranete. We’ll just call it the blood of christ.
            28. answered: earlier I smoked a cigar filled with Marijuana… its all the rage with popular culture
            29. answered: Red Stag! BUT, I gotta save up the stache for Armageddon and the dawning of the age of Aquarius.
            30. answered: Water. :( Then again, I’m at work. What’re you gonna do?
            31. answered: Whey protein because I went to the gym LOL
            32. answered: Uncommon Brewers’ Baltic Porter, after a shot of Fireball whiskey. Now with 100% more sleep! x_x
            33. answered: Whiskey and Kiddy Cocktails. Get a bit of wicked and a bit of innocence ;-)
            34. answered: Fort Collins Brewery “Major Tom’s Pomegranate Wheat” :)
            35. answered: burrrrrrzzzzzz
            36. said: newcastle and a bag of fritos on the side
            37. answered: E & J , Mixed With Ciroc
            38. answered: Bacardi