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------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.
----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.
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::: | thedailywhat:
Gag-Inducing Gourmet of the Day: The Food Network’s Sandra Lee mixes lemonade and vodka with heavy cream expecting it to taste good. Not surprisingly, it curdles on contact and she suffers a mini-stroke.
[nymag.]WHY AM I LAUGHING SO HARD?
Internet porn needs more of this.
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texnessa:fakemustache:futurisms | thedailywhat:...Gag-Inducing Gourmet of the Day: The...
