an except from the Hookers&Cake travel guide book
The mob built Vegas out of showgirls and blow. No really, if you punch a hole in the wall at Caesars you will see actual ancient pyramids of showgirls holding its massive columns in place. Sinatra’s sarcophagus is also hidden down there somewhere. A secret chamber, protected by the evil glass eye of Sammy Davis Jr.
Legend also said that The Hilton had a penthouse specially built for Elvis. There you could snort the drywall and not sleep for a week. There was a fountain full of bubblin moonshine… just picture Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory, only replace the candy and Umpa Lumpas with drugs and fine, fine, young showgirls.
These are the visions that I always entertain when I think of Vegas. Sadly this Vegas no longer exists. Like most things in America, old Los Vegas has been replaced by an endless homogenized gambling mall, equal parts Walmart & Disneyland. Its safe, well lit and oh so boring.
