Hookers or Cake

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I'm too wacky to be hip.

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      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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          • February 12, 2010 11:24 pm
            I once paddled a canoe out into the middle of a lake in Gainesville, Florida with a nice young lady. I was just visiting. The sun was just starting to set and there were all of these glowing eyes on the water. “Are those alligators?” I stammered. “Yep!” smiled the girl. There were hundreds of em. It was around this same time that I realized that neither of us knew what the fuck we were doing when it came to canoes. Thats the kinda shit that happens when you smoke to much pot and get all giggly with the ladies. It was one of those moments were you have an out of body experience. The words GAME OVER flash on the screen and Chuck Barris gets up and goes over and bangs the gong. pic from a Playboy ad - August 68’

            I once paddled a canoe out into the middle of a lake in Gainesville, Florida with a nice young lady. I was just visiting. The sun was just starting to set and there were all of these glowing eyes on the water. “Are those alligators?” I stammered. “Yep!” smiled the girl. There were hundreds of em.

            It was around this same time that I realized that neither of us knew what the fuck we were doing when it came to canoes. Thats the kinda shit that happens when you smoke to much pot and get all giggly with the ladies.

            It was one of those moments were you have an out of body experience. The words GAME OVER flash on the screen and Chuck Barris gets up and goes over and bangs the gong.

            pic from a Playboy ad - August 68’

            14 notes Filed under:  silly stories,.
            1. hookersorcake posted this
          by Peter Vidani. For .
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