Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

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      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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          • August 4, 2012 1:28 am
            Who was the first media personality outside of societal norms that you wanted sexually? For instance when I was twelve I realized I wanted to get with Blanche Dubious of TV’s Golden Girls. She was playing a sixty year old, southern belle hussy and I was enchanted. She was raring to go. And I liked that. ?

            Who was the first media personality outside of societal norms that you wanted sexually?

            For instance when I was twelve I realized I wanted to get with Blanche Dubious of TV’s Golden Girls. She was playing a sixty year old, southern belle hussy and I was enchanted. She was raring to go. And I liked that.

            ?

            50 notes Filed under:  Daffy Duck,.
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            4. answered: “Boy” from the old Tarzan. As a 10 y.o. we were about the same age (except he was about 80 when I was watching) I would lean into the TV when
            5. said: Lurch.
            6. answered: Captain Dan. You know. Post leg-removal. When he’s all boozed up with floozies.
            7. reblogged this from hookersorcake
            8. answered: Pappa Smurf
            9. answered: Blanche Dubious, Lee Liberace, same difference. I had a hard spot in my wiener for Granny Maude Frickert.
            10. answered: Does Bowie count? I don’t know what norm is anymore.
            11. answered: Dr. Benton Quest: smart, adventurous, and DAT BEARD. As an adult I recognized I’d likely cheat on him with Dr.Venture in my mid-life crisis.
            12. said: media personality outside of societal norms  ?????????????
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            16. answered: Jakee from 227!
            17. answered: Phil Lynott from Thin Lizzy - a controversial choice for a white girl in old regime era of South Africa
            18. answered: Spock. All I ever wanted was Spock.
            19. reblogged this from and added:
            20. answered: Dr. Zachary Smith because he was a cunning linquist and a drama queen. And he wore velour.
            21. answered: Stefan Urquelle, Steve Urkell’s alter-ego. It wasn’t looks, so much as it was the idea of a ideal, perfectly construction dreamboat.
            22. answered: I didn’t want him sexually, but I remember being turned on by Groucho Marx. I was 5 and I imagined him eating out pussy with his mustache.
            23. reblogged this from hookersorcake and added:
            24. answered: Ethan Craft
            25. answered: It was a really close tie between Superman and The Fall Guy.
            26. reblogged this from hookersorcake and added:
            27. ordinarywonder answered: If it counts: Scarlett from the GI JOE Movie. I think I remember she got captured and tied up, and I thought that was erotic, even as a kid.
            28. reblogged this from hookersorcake
            29. said: The Green Girl from the original Star Treck…I was 4 or 5 and ready for my first 3 way….with Ulhura and this one…grrrrr!
            30. answered: Larry King, I always have loved him since I was a teen. hahah
            31. answered: The main character from the movie Robots!
            32. answered: would Penelope Pussycat be outside of societal norms? I wanted her as bad as Pepe lol
            33. hughman said: chris meloni. it was outside of “societal norms” that i would want a straight man. what was i, italian?
            34. answered: Chubaka. I liked the strong silent type.
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