Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

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    • ------------------------------------- How this blog got its name

      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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          tell me lies! Submit stuff
          • July 24, 2012 1:48 am
            Listen I’m not intersted in telling someone what they want to hear, something that will make them happy and content. Contrary to what everyone tries to sell you, life is not about happiness and comfort. Everyone you know is going to whither away or get torn to pieces. Get it through your stupid fucking head. The happy ending is my mother and father. They were married for 53 years and I got to watch her weep over his body, “I loved you so much,” she sobbed. And then she wandered around unable to sleep without being drugged, for 2 years. “I can’t find him.” she’d say. “I don’t know where he is.” Thats the ‘They lived happily ever after’ Thats about the best you can do. So get over your childish fucking need for comfort and safety. You might as well fucking live. Cuz you sure as fuck are going to die. 

            Listen I’m not intersted in telling someone what they want to hear, something that will make them happy and content. Contrary to what everyone tries to sell you, life is not about happiness and comfort. Everyone you know is going to whither away or get torn to pieces. Get it through your stupid fucking head.

            The happy ending is my mother and father. They were married for 53 years and I got to watch her weep over his body, “I loved you so much,” she sobbed. And then she wandered around unable to sleep without being drugged, for 2 years. “I can’t find him.” she’d say. “I don’t know where he is.”

            Thats the ‘They lived happily ever after’ Thats about the best you can do. So get over your childish fucking need for comfort and safety. You might as well fucking live. Cuz you sure as fuck are going to die. 

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