Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

--------------------------------

    • Illustration
      •
    • My Videos
    • The best of Hookers or Cake
      • ------------------------------------- How this blog got its name

      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

      -----------------------------------

      Amazon.com Widgets

      -------------------------------------- more fun categories

      --------------------------------------

      • Inspiration
      • art
        • ----------------------------------------- some tumblr friends

        -----------------------------------------

        • Rrrick
        • Fuzzy Dave
        • Wonder Tonic
          • ----------------------------------------- some writing

          -----------------------------------------

          • Josh Luft
          • I'm a Veronica
        • Mr. King was here
          • Aloha Friday
          ----------------------------------------
          tell me lies! Submit stuff
          • June 23, 2012 1:42 am
            The Shittiest Gods Ever What kinda car was the holy spirit driving when it lost his license for speeding? Where did Adam & Eve shit in the Garden of Eden? Why didn’t Jesus wear his penis when he was busy down here bleeding?

            The Shittiest Gods Ever

            What kinda car was the holy spirit driving

            when it lost his license for speeding?

            Where did Adam & Eve shit

            in the Garden of Eden?

            Why didn’t Jesus wear his penis

            when he was busy down here bleeding?

            39 notes Filed under:  poetry, prose, religion, the jealous meat,.
            1. reblogged this from hookersorcake
            2. reblogged this from hookersorcake
            3. answered: This is why we need to make some new gods. Let’s start with a terrifying ventriloquist dummy. HE DEMANDS SACRIFICE.
            4. reblogged this from
            5. answered: “There where it smells of shit it smells of being.” — Antonin Arthaud
            6. reblogged this from hookersorcake
            7. answered: AMC Javelin. They didn’t shit until they ate the fruit of knowledge (outside the garden). He loaned it to the leper he healed.
            8. answered: just wrote a poem called: and a good fuck, too - it’s your fault - this started it ;p
            9. reblogged this from hookersorcake
            10. answered: damn you, mysteries of the cosmos!
            11. hookersorcake posted this
          by Peter Vidani. For .
          © 2009–2013 Hookers or Cake