Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

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      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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          • December 26, 2010 1:18 pm
            My favorite artist was someone who went to my old church.They’d blacked out all the words in the bible so only three words appeared on each page.             I      love                 you I first discovered this work while sitting through an interminable church service. The minister was spewing some hate filled nonsense and I finally picked up the Holy Bible, curious if it really said all these terrible things. To my wonder and surprise all I found was page after page of “I love you”it was like a choir of angels was hammering a very simple song into my heart.I sat there in quiet awe while the asshole preacher prattled on and on with his hate filled fever dream. I was flipping through all those pages as the chorus sang upon me until I broke down and every fiber of my own being too began to sing. I love you - I love you through everything you big dummy - I love you I saw every mean and stupid thing I’d done. And a great compassion swelled within me. I found myself flooded by a strange tenderness for my very own self.  It then spilled and splashed across everything I saw until all was colored wet and bubblin  - baptized in the water light love of compassion  all is perfect and free - even the asshole preacher. Finally I staggered to my feet and thundered out a proclamation to the pastor - “HEY FUCKFACE! Why don’t you put on some pants and get a real job! Cuz you fuckin suck at this one!” And the universe roared a bright horn chorus of  “Dude!” and the high fives were glorious and everlasting.  - for Jesse Hassler - 1971-2010

            My favorite artist was someone who went to my old church.

            They’d blacked out all the words in the bible so only three words appeared on each page.


                        I


                 love
                            you


            I first discovered this work while sitting through an interminable church service. The minister was spewing some hate filled nonsense and I finally picked up the Holy Bible, curious if it really said all these terrible things.

            To my wonder and surprise all I found was page after page of “I love you”
            it was like a choir of angels was hammering a very simple song into my heart.
            I sat there in quiet awe while the asshole preacher prattled on and on with his hate filled fever dream. I was flipping through all those pages as the chorus sang upon me until I broke down and every fiber of my own being too began to sing.

            I love you - I love you through everything you big dummy - I love you

            I saw every mean and stupid thing I’d done. And a great compassion swelled within me. I found myself flooded by a strange tenderness for my very own self.  It then spilled and splashed across everything I saw until all was colored wet and bubblin  - baptized in the water light love of compassion  all is perfect and free - even the asshole preacher.

            Finally I staggered to my feet and thundered out a proclamation to the pastor - “HEY FUCKFACE! Why don’t you put on some pants and get a real job! Cuz you fuckin suck at this one!”

            And the universe roared a bright horn chorus of  “Dude!” and the high fives were glorious and everlasting.

             - for Jesse Hassler - 1971-2010

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