Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

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      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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          • May 11, 2012 12:29 am
            notebook - 5.11.12    and of all this glorious bright sighing   that the commercials are blarbling on about   who are these people having so much fun?Hey does anyone remember some J-E-L-L-o commercial from a year or so ago?There were three women in red dancingThey had become so overwhelmed by the taste of J-E-L-L-o that they broke into spontaneous dance in a Deli and knocked over the salad bar. And then everyone just started busting shit up. The anger spilled over and politicians fought openly on the congressional floor and bears openly made love on mainstreet in front of God and country.in front of all the nice people we forgot to fuck and killwho’s gonna buy alll these reasonable priced entry level sedansif we don’t play niceYou idiots wouldn’t know how to drive a Suburu even if you did have the balls. A stranger called me and asked what kinda car I thought Teddy Roosevelt would drive. I instantly thought a Chevette because Teddy seemed like the kinda guy that didn’t need to drive a fancy car to feel better about himself, but I figure its the feds on the other end and they’re looking for commies so I act dumb and say “I dunno, a Lincoln?!” The Buddha uses incense sticks to light the dynamite. I bring my coven of blood to class in a Tupperware bowl. I always offer it to others and then I sip it coolly from its hard plastic tomb.  - my old geometry II teacher wrote a book and its really kinda fucked up. Now he’s rich and famous and he drives around in a big truck that looks like it was designed by ZZ-top.

            notebook - 5.11.12

               and of all this glorious bright sighing
               that the commercials are blarbling on about
               who are these people having so much fun?

            Hey does anyone remember some J-E-L-L-o commercial from a year or so ago?

            There were three women in red dancing
            They had become so overwhelmed by the taste of J-E-L-L-o that they broke into spontaneous dance in a Deli and knocked over the salad bar. And then everyone just started busting shit up. The anger spilled over and politicians fought openly on the congressional floor and bears openly made love on mainstreet in front of God and country.

            in front of all the nice people we forgot to fuck and kill

            who’s gonna buy alll these reasonable priced entry level sedans

            if we don’t play nice

            You idiots wouldn’t know how to drive a Suburu even if you did have the balls.

            A stranger called me and asked what kinda car I thought Teddy Roosevelt would drive. I instantly thought a Chevette because Teddy seemed like the kinda guy that didn’t need to drive a fancy car to feel better about himself, but I figure its the feds on the other end and they’re looking for commies so I act dumb and say “I dunno, a Lincoln?!”

            The Buddha uses incense sticks to light the dynamite.

            I bring my coven of blood to class in a Tupperware bowl. I always offer it to others and then I sip it coolly from its hard plastic tomb.

             - my old geometry II teacher wrote a book and its really kinda fucked up. Now he’s rich and famous and he drives around in a big truck that looks like it was designed by ZZ-top.

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