Hookers or Cake

Where the self-obsessed get serious about silly
I'm too wacky to be hip.

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      • ------------------------------------- How this blog got its name

      ------------------------------------ There was a large painting of Evel Knievel shaking hands with Richard Nixon. It hung in the Mayors office. Late one evening after everyone went home. I took it down to the lab. I zoomed in on Evel’s left eye a 100x and enhanced it. It was an address. I went to the address. It was a modest, 1970’s style, split level ranch home in the suburbs.

      ----------------------------------- Inside I found a dead parrot lying on a waterbed. I revived the parrot with some saltines and adrenaline. We became good friends. The parrots name was Randy. One night a few years later while Randy and me played Gin Rummy, he sang me a song about a fire. The title of this blog was never mentioned but I sensed it, and Randy confirmed it by giving me ‘THE LOOK’.

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          tell me lies! Submit stuff
          • April 22, 2012 11:36 pm

            Hey what should I write about?

            40 notes
            1. answered: what you know (yeh, right) - just keep on mangling literature exactly like you do (salut!)()
            2. answered: BLACK METAL
            3. answered: write about you and me running away :-D
            4. answered: the crumbs in Alan Moore’s beard.
            5. answered: Dual diagnosis: Alcoholism/addiction and Bipolar from the angle of a fecking funny loving and yet isolating 42 year old woman’s perspective.
            6. answered: A man who develops a romantic relationship with another man who looks exactly like him but it’s actually just a metaphor for masturbation
            7. answered: Eggs.
            8. answered: That feeling you get after spending all day hiking in the sun & finally get home, shower and lay on your bed naked, sore and warm
            9. answered: the shell people
            10. answered: unwarranted self-importance
            11. answered: That time it completely, totally didn’t work.
            12. answered: see my message
            13. answered: Zucchinis and/or the loa loa worm.
            14. criminalwisdom answered: Where the bodies are…
            15. answered: Parasites around the house. The kinds we love and the the kinds we love to hate. Also known as in-laws.
            16. answered: love
            17. answered: a lobster having sex with a pepsi can
            18. answered: That tunnel you found behind the false back in your bathroom cabinet.
            19. answered: A hookersorcake rendition of classic fairy tales but with an mknightshamamamylon twist 
            20. answered: the sex life of an ice cube :) minimum of 500 words…lol..
            21. answered: Clearly you need to write about that time me’n’the Giant had too much bourbon. It is happening again.
            22. answered: How upset Tupac is about being trapped inside of a hologram.
            23. hughman answered: your current obsession with ham.
            24. squarewaves answered: buckyballs
            25. answered: The constant despair of a goldfish in a bowl.
            26. answered: long nights behind the spam factory
            27. answered: Hookers and Cake together
            28. ordinarywonder answered: Things that ended up being better/worse than you thought they would be as a kid.
            29. answered: Dolph Lundgren
            30. answered: Balls.
            31. answered: frozen tv dinners
            32. answered: Tortises, Cotton Candy, Sly sly foxes, and me
            33. answered: Patrick Swayze
            34. answered: Bukkake and metzitzah b’peh. In the same post.
            35. answered: The conection between Ikea and microsoft.
            36. hookersorcake posted this
          by Peter Vidani. For .
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